Cops: Jevon Kearse Freakishly Drunk

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Feared by quarterbacks everywhere -- not feared by college popo.

NFL superstar defensive end Jevon "The Freak" Kearse was arrested and charged with a DUI near the Vanderbilt University campus in Nashville, Tenn. early this morning.

We're told Vandy police pulled over Jevon's Escalade at 4:42 AM CT after it was spotted "swerving at a high rate of speed." After Jevon failed field sobriety tests, he refused to take a breathalyzer.

Cops immediately booked the six-foot-four, 265 lb. Tennessee Titans star into the Criminal Justice Center in downtown Nashville.

He was released on $1,000 bond.

The Titans have yet to return our call.

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Sexy Soccer Studs

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Move over David Beckham, you ain't the only smokin' hottie in soccer anymore. It doesn't matter whose team they're on, these athletes have more than just mad skills on the field.

Funny Car Crash No Laughing Matter

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There's got to be a better name for these jacked-up roadsters than Funny Car.

Scott Kalitta, 46, died Saturday after his Funny Car burst into flames while going 300 MPH and then smashed into a barrier at a New Jersey raceway. The two-time Top Fuel champion was pronounced dead at hospital a short time later.

Kalitta is survived by his father, his wife, Kathy, and two sons, Corey, 14, and Colin, 8.

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Former Celtic Has No Pot of Gold to Pee In

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Vin Baker may wanna lace his Reebok Pumps back up -- because the former basketballer ain't ballin' any more!

Baker's nearly 10,000 sq. ft. Conn. home is going up on the auction blocks later this month for a decent $2.3 million, according to ml-implode.com.

This isn't Vin's first dance with foreclosure -- his restaurant, Vinnie's Saybrook Fish House, also went under earlier this year.

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Bills RB Hit by Stiff Arm of the Law

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Buffalo Bills running back Marshawn Lynch will plead guilty to unspecified charges after a not-so mysterious hit-and-run that occurred last month, according to Erie County District Attorney Frank Clark.

A woman was struck by an SUV registered to Lynch in a Buffalo, NY intersection on May 31 -- and since then Lynch and his lawyers have been avoiding authorities.

The woman was left with a bruised hip and a cut that needed seven stitches.

A call to the Bills has yet to be returned.

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Keyshawn to Javon: Ice Got You Cold Cocked

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Ex-footballer Keyshawn Johnson told TMZ about his own experience at being robbed at gunpoint -- which might be why he doesn't flaunt his cash flow out in the open.

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Giants Running Back Behind Bars

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NY Giants running back Ahmad Bradshaw has been cooling his heels in a Virginia jail since Sunday for a probation violation.

A jail spokesperson told the Bristol Herald Courier that Bradshaw "voluntarily came into jail" because of a court order and "wasn't brought in by police officers and stuff."

We're told the probation violation comes stems from an arrest from when he was a juvenile -- and that file is sealed.

In a statement, the Giants said: "We are aware of the situation and have been in contact with Ahmad's legal representative. This situation is not the result of any recent incident. It stems from an issue that occurred prior to Ahmad being drafted by the Giants. Beyond that, we have no further comment."

UPDATE: His lawyer tells TMZ Bradshaw is serving 30 days for a probation violaton, adding Bradshaw "has not been charged with any offense since being drafted by the New York Giants and is eager to put this matter behind him and begin training for next season."

Pacman's "Make It Rain" Friend Found Dead

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Sadia Morrison, the woman who was with NFL star Pacman Jones during his infamous Vegas strip club melee last year, was found dead in New York on Friday -- and her friends and family think she was thrown off a building.

Police have not ruled on anything yet, only that they're "
looking at any and all possibilities."

According to BET.com, Morrison had recently organized a celebrity PlayStation tournament at Jay-Z's 40/40 Club to raise funds for at-risk youth.

Morrison plead no contest to her role in the brawl that left a security guard shot and paralyzed from the waist down.

Eli's Wifey: Needs to Call a Fashion Audible?

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Super Bowl champ Eli Manning and his prom date wife, Abby McGrew, showed up to an event in New York City this week, looking content.

Fashionistas are sniffing about her get-up, saying it's "too short, too tight, and doesn't fit well. The zipper doesn't zip and she's bursting out of it."

Wait, is that a bad thing?

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Bad Errand Boy: Brady Gets Ticketed

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Gisele is not gonna be happy about this! While Tommy boy went about his daily chores picking up packages on Wednesday, the man servant got a parking ticket. Can't you do anything right?!

Unlike supermodels, you need to feed the meter.

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Walker: I Was Victim of Shotgun Offense

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Just moments after getting out of oral surgery to fix his broken face, NFL star Javon Walker blew the lid off his mysterious beatdown -- claiming he was abducted out of his Las Vegas hotel room by gun-toting thugs early Monday morning.

In an exclusive statement to TheDirty.com Walker said, "I was just back at my room and at about 5:30 in the morning, I got a knock at the door, I opened it and three guys with guns were there, they cracked me in the head a few times knocking me unconscious. They then robbed me of everything I had -- my watch, money -- everything! Somehow they got me to the car and dropped me off in the street. That's what happened."

Walker, who just signed a $55 million dollar contract with the Oakland Raiders, also says reports that the robbery stems from the champagne wars with Floyd Mayweather at Body English nightclub earlier in the evening are completely false.

Steven Tyler: What Rehab? Go C's!

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The Lakers aren't the only team that can draw the big names!

Steven Tyler -- fresh off a trip to rehab he blamed on foot pain (*cough, cough* bulls**t) -- is courtside for tonight's Lakers vs. Cetlics game.

We're hearing he's finished his stint at the rehab center, but is still undergoing outpatient treatment. Sounds like a good deal to us!

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Tennis Legend Billie Jean King 'Memba Her?!

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Throughout her career, Billie Jean King won 12 Grand Slam tennis titles and defeated Bobby Riggs during the infamous Battle of the Sexes match in 1973. Guess what she looks like now!

Javon -- Sprayed Out Before He Got Laid Out

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Hours before Javon Walker got his face broken during a late-night robbery, the NFL superstar was partying his face off at a nightclub.

SpyOnVegas.com caught Walker, who wore a gigantic diamond watch to the "Sunday School" party at Body English, spraying the crowd down with bottles of Dom Perignon Rosé from his own private booth. We're told Walker, who just signed a $55 million deal with the Raiders, dropped at least $15,000 inside the club that night.

Hours after the pics were taken, Walker was found unconscious at an intersection near the Strip, having suffered a fractured eye socket.

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