It's Not Madonna!

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It's former WWE wrestler 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin leaving the gym.

The guy is jacked!

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Michael Vick 'I Made Bad Decisions'

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The Michael Vick "Please Don't Pelt Me with Objects" tour began today as Vick addressed the press for the first time as a member of the Philadelphia Eagles.

Vick said all the right things -- like "I won't disappoint," "Playing in the NFL is a privilege, not a right," and "You only get one shot at a second chance" -- but he's still got a long way to go to win over the fans of Philly.

Remember, these are the same people that booed Santa Claus.

Pink to Vick I Hope The Fans Tear You Apart!

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Pink is not a fan of Michael Vick -- and now that he's playin' ball in her hometown, she's letting everyone know how damn pissed off she is about it!

The singer just unleashed on the dude on her Twitter page, firing off the following message:

"wow. michael vick in MY hometown, Philly. of all the places. I hope the fans tear him to pieces like his beloved dogs."

There are already several protests set to go off today in Philly -- no word if Pink plans to join in.

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Marbury Gets Blunt 'I Smoke Marijuana!'

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The cat is out of the dime bag -- Stephon Marbury admitted, on camera, that he's in love with Mary Jane.

After lighting up a suspicious joint on his livestream -- which we posted yesterday -- the basketball star came clean about what he was actually smoking. Anyone surprised?

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Olympic Runner Mary Decker 'Memba Her?!

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Mary Decker was favored to win the gold medal in the 3000 meter final at the 1984 Summer Olympic Games for the USA, until she tripped on barefoot South African runner Zola Budd and fell. Guess what she looks like now!

Michael Phelps Involved in Three Car Smash Up

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UPDATE: Cops tell TMZ alcohol was NOT a factor in the crash. We're told cops interviewed Phelps after the accident and determined that a field sobriety test was not necessary.

We're told Michael refused medical treatment and left in a "personal vehicle."

Michael Phelps
was just involved in a three-car accident in his hometown of Baltimore.

Phelps reportedly emerged from the wreck unscathed, but a woman in the other car was shaken up and taken to a local hospital. We're told she complained of "head and arm pain."

The accident occurred around 9pm local time.

A police spokesman says the Olympic Gold Medal winner was driving a Cadillac Escalade, which collided with a Honda accord.

We're told by witnesses on the scene -- the two cars collided after someone ran a stoplight -- and then hit a third car that was not moving at the time.

Police are investigating the cause of the crash.

One of the local papers is reporting that a passenger in Phelps' car was also injured, but it's unclear as to the extent of that person's injuries.

We're told there is already a tow-truck on scene removing Phelps' ride. We're told Michael's car received "heavy damage."

Story developing...

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Philadelphia Eagles Swoop Up Michael Vick

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Let the booing begin -- Michael Vick has officially been signed by an NFL team.

Vick's agent told ESPN the quarterback/canine's worst nightmare just signed a two-year deal with the Philadelphia Eagles.

Details of the deal have yet to be released, but you can bet the doghouse he won't reclaim his spot as the NFL's highest paid player.

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Michael Vick -- A Tight End to the Rumors

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Michael Vick's days as quarterback might be over -- because last night in Virginia, the former dogfighting Atlanta Falcon told our Fantasy Football playin' photog to mark him down as a "tight end."

Ironically, that was also his nickname in prison.

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Marbury -- What's He Smokin'? No, Seriously

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You might as well call Stephon Marbury 'The Orkin Man' ... 'cause this guy KILLS roaches!

Stephon Marbury got lit today on his neverending livestream, smoking what looked like a joint in his car -- but hey, at least he wasn't driving.

Though Marbury may be violating the law (if it is a joint), at least he's arguably on the right side of the 5150 line ... i.e, he's not eating Vaseline.

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Mike Vick in Chicago -- For Da Dogs, Not Da Bears

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We now know why we spotted Michael Vick trolling around the Chicago airport -- he's there to howl about the unethical treatment of canines at an event for the Humane Society of the United States.

A rep for the H.S. tells us Vick just spoke at an anti-dog fighting event in the Englewood section of the city -- which will help raise awareness about his efforts to clean up his own image.

If you're sad you missed Vick's speech, don't worry, the H.S. rep tells us it's all a part of his probation and he'll be doing this for "months and years" to come.

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TMZ Live -- Talk Sports!

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Evan Rosenblum and Charles Latibeaudiere talked all things sports today -- from Michael Vick's potential comeback to basketball star Stephon Marbury's crazy viral video antics.

Dwight Howard Nude Pic -- 'Falsified & Doctored'

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An X-rated photo circulating on the web -- which appears to show an exposed Dwight Howard -- is fake, his agency tells TMZ.

In a statement released moments ago, Dwight's people said, "We have been working with our attorneys with mediatakeout.com all morning to get the photos taken down because they are falsified and doctored."

Dwight's people also say they're unsure if the Orlando Magic star has seen the pictures yet since he's filming a movie right now in New Jersey.

Michael Vick Bearing Down in Chicago

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UPDATE: Jim Christman, the media services manager for the Bears, tells us Vick is not in town to meet with the Bears and he is definitely not joining the team.

Attention Fantasy Football Nerds
: TMZ shot footage of Michael Vick in Chicago last night -- which begs the million dollar question ... is Vick destined for Da Bears!?

Dude wasn't in the mood to talk when we spotted him at O'Hare Airport in Chi-Town -- but with rumors swirling that he's close to a deal with a mystery NFL team, this footage could be a HUGE clue.

The message here: If your commissioner is stupid enough to hold an early draft, don't select Jay Cutler just yet...

NBA Star Accused of Pizza Joint Beatdown

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He was hungry for some pizza -- but a man who happened to be dining at the same restaurant as NBA star Zach Randolph last year says the basketball star dished out an asskicking! But wait! According to Zach, it could be a shake down. Or a Shakey Down.

A guy named Gary Ferguson has filed a lawsuit against Randolph, claiming the former Los Angeles Clipper beat the crap out of him on a night when the Clips got beat down on the court.

It all went down inside Berri's Pizza Cafe in L..A. -- where Randolph allegedly "verbally and physically threatened" Gary before "attacking" the guy.

Gary's lawyer claims his client walked away with damaged teeth, a messed up neck and back, a knee injury that will require surgery, and scars on his face.

As for Zach -- his lawyer, Raymond Brothers, tells us he met with Gary's lawyer who first demanded $250,000, then $200,000 and finally $25,000.

Brothers says Gary's own lawyer said Gary was "out of control" and just wanted a quick payout. Brothers says it was a shake down and he walked out, only to get a call from Gary's star witness, who said the case would go away quick if he coughed up some dough. Brothers told her to pound sand.

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Pittsburgh Steelers Targeted Over Gun Party

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The Pittsburgh Steelers are in the cross-hairs again after pictures surfaced of 14 players horsing around with guns -- and pointing them at each other's heads at a police firing range in 2006.

The photos appear to show several key members from the 2006 Super Bowl championship team -- including Joey Porter (front left), Ike Taylor, James Harrison, Max Starks, James Farrior, Brett Keisel and Najeh Davenport -- screwin' around with the high-power firearms while state troopers smiled in the background.

Ironically, a police spokesperson claims the players were there because the "Steelers camp" had requested a gun safety course.

Even the National Rifle Association won't defend this, telling the Philidelphia Daily News there were multiple "dumb and dangerous" safety violations. No kidding...

UPDATE
: The Steelers just released the following statement:

"Steelers players are counseled at least annually on the importance of gun safety. We are not aware of any violations of law or NFL policies in regard to the visit to the State Police facilities three years ago. We recommend all of our players use extreme caution and good judgment if they choose to possess a firearm."

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Roethlisberger -- She 'Hoped' To Have My Baby

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Ben Roethlisberger's lawyers have unloaded some serious allegations right back at Andrea McNulty -- claiming the woman accusing the football star of sexual assault told her friends she "hoped" Ben had knocked her up.

In legal documents filed Friday in Washoe County, Nevada, Ben's legal squad goes after McNulty's "false and slanderous" claim -- and insists she "boasted to her friends and co-workers that she had consensual sexual relations with Mr. Roethlisberger and was happy about that."

As far as pregnancy is concerned, Roethlisberger claims after the incident, McNulty "was also not afraid or apprehensive about the prospect of an unplanned pregnancy, but expressed to others that she had hoped that she was pregnant by Mr. Roethlisberger."

And it didn't stop there....